Ignorance is Bliss [Kashmore]

[Kenji]

[bg=000000][atrb=width,500,true][atrb=border,0,true] I don't wanna be told to grow up! And I don't wanna change.. So you better give up! 'cause I'm not gonna change.. I don't wanna grow up! The wall was so big! Kenji had certainly seen a lot of big things in his life. Big and scary things. He gulped at the mere thought of it now. Thinking back, the big scary bears, the big scary kitties...the big and scary wolves. Just the thought of one in particular wolf nearly made him yelp in fear. But he couldn't be afraid, no he had to be brave! But still the rock wall thingy was so big! Even the big scary animals that he had encountered would be threatened by it. He himself felt threatened by it. Kenji pressed his nose to the rock taking in it's scent. It was just...rock. Dirt and stone. Nothing to be afraid of, nothing at all. He had to remind himself to be brave now, that things weren't going to hurt him. That if he just stayed out of trouble long enough, he could be brave... Kenji's past flooded into his mind like a sack of bricks walloping him in the face. He stumbled back. Staring up toward the archway. His ears folded back now he whimpered. Tamaki..His life, his brother. He was the one who protected him from the bad things, he was his own bravery so that Kenji could live his life carefree. And where was he now? Why was he gone...? It was all his fault. Kenji kept staring up at the heavens. He was waiting for the day where he would come back, a quick glance over his shoulder he shuddered. All this time he had been running, running for what purpose? There wasn't any real reason he was running forward, just running away from his past. From all of the hurt and pain. He remembered the blood, the pain, he tasted his own tears. Kenji stared down at the ground. He felt a wave of emotions that he wasn't prepared for. In the silence of the world around him he was finally aware at how alone he truly was. He hadn't looked back into his past ever since Tamaki's death. His rump fell onto the ground as he shuddered, trying his damnedest not to cry. His shoulders hunched forward as his breath became uneven. It was all his fault, all his stupid fault. There was a darkness in Kenji that was slowly consuming his soul. He wondered at times how he could remain so carefree and still be so alone. He fought away the mental harassment and thought about the good things in life. He managed to smile as he stared into the unknown world that he was determined to face with a grin on his lips. He remembered all of the happiness and playfulness of his past with his brother and Kashmore... His light in the darkness, his will to live. He froze, not realizing he was holding his breath momentarily he gasped faintly standing up and scenting the air. There had to be a reason he was standing here in the unknown now. It had to be destiny, ever since the day he ran away because of that huge wolf...Tank was his name? He had attacked Tamaki in replace of him for fraternizing with Kashmore. He couldn't help himself, even thinking of her beauty made his tongue dry, made it hard to think. She was the grace that kept his heart pure against the hatred that he had for that male. It took a lot for Kenji to hold a grudge, but this was different. What that grotesque excuse for a male had done to his big brother was not forgivable. But most importantly, he stole him away from Kenji. His rock, his backbone, his reason for being who he was. There were times where Kenji didn't know who he was anymore, he felt so helpless without his brother. But he had come so far without him, he had to give himself credit. He had to be brave, for both of them. But most importantly, he knew Tamaki would have wanted that, he always wanted Kenji to be more responsible for his life. So he would live for both of them now. Kenji's tail managed a faint wag as he sighed tenderly to himself. He could scent something familiar about this place. It had to be Kashmore, it just had to be. He had been wandering aimlessly for what seemed like a year now, never forgetting her face. Never forgetting her smile, her kindness. Perhaps he was naive, maybe she never even cared about him. Or maybe he was just a fool for falling for her. But he fell hard, he had never really been close to the opposite sex before, but Kash, she was different, she was a puppy in a wolf's body just like he was. Bah, maybe he just had a bad case of puppy love but he just couldn't shake her. He didn't know where else to turn at this point, he couldn't go back, he had to go forward. With his past behind him Kenji took a step forward into the deserted area, facing his fears head on as he had always done wandering under the archway silently. His ears folding back yet his eyes remaining vigilant. He had come all this way, he thought for nothing. But that scent, that sweet scent that had remnants of his beautiful maiden, his white goddess in the world of darkness. Perhaps Kenji would feel different if he had known that it was indeed Kashmore that had sicked the wrath of Tank on his helpless brother aiming to kill him because he had flirted with something that Tank considered his. He had fought for her because she had run away. But that made him more the ignorant fool. Thus he could stay in his airy bliss as he tentatively strolled into the land with his tail wagging softly behind him. He grinned big and began to bound into the land not quite sure what to do? Did she even remember him? Did she even want to see him again, or care about him? He convinced himself she did and thus he let out a resounding howl when all four of his paws crashed onto the earth with his tail whipping against the air he cut it off short and looked around with his tongue lolling out of his mouth expecting her to appear out of thin air. Text Speech Thoughts!

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